PLEASE Skills

Definition

PLEASE skills are a set of emotion regulation techniques from Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) designed to reduce your emotional vulnerability by taking care of your basic physical and mental health needs. These skills help you build a foundation of stability that makes you less susceptible to intense emotional reactions and better able to cope with life's challenges.

What PLEASE Stands For

The PLEASE Acronym

PL: Treat PhysicaL illness and take prescribed medications

E: Balance Eating to maintain stable blood sugar and energy

A: Avoid mood-Altering substances that can destabilise emotions

S: Balance Sleep to support emotional regulation

E: Get Exercise to improve mood and stress resilience

Why PLEASE Skills Matter for You

The Foundation of Emotional Stability

When your basic needs aren't met, you become more vulnerable to emotional overwhelm, mood swings, and difficulty coping with stress. PLEASE skills help you create the physical and mental conditions that support emotional balance and resilience.

Prevention vs. Crisis Management

Rather than waiting until you're in emotional crisis, PLEASE skills help you prevent emotional vulnerability by maintaining the lifestyle factors that support stable mood and effective coping.

Treating Physical Illness (PhysicaL)

Taking Care of Your Health

You can reduce emotional vulnerability by seeing healthcare providers regularly for check-ups and preventive care, taking prescribed medications as directed, addressing health issues promptly rather than ignoring them, and managing chronic conditions effectively.

The Mind-Body Connection

Physical illness and pain can significantly impact your emotional state. When you take care of your physical health, you're also supporting your emotional well-being and your ability to handle stress effectively.

Balancing Your Eating

Stable Blood Sugar for Stable Emotions

You can support emotional regulation by eating regular meals to prevent blood sugar crashes, including protein and complex carbohydrates for sustained energy, avoiding excessive caffeine that can increase anxiety, and staying adequately hydrated throughout the day.

Mindful Eating Practices

Pay attention to how different foods affect your mood and energy, eat when you're hungry rather than waiting until you're starving, and avoid using food to cope with emotions when possible.

Avoiding Mood-Altering Substances

Substances That Affect Emotions

You can protect your emotional stability by limiting alcohol consumption, which can worsen depression and anxiety, avoiding recreational drugs that can destabilise mood, being cautious with caffeine if you're prone to anxiety, and discussing any concerns about prescription medications with your healthcare provider.

Finding Healthy Alternatives

Instead of using substances to cope with emotions, you can develop other coping strategies like exercise, social connection, creative activities, or relaxation techniques.

Balancing Your Sleep

Sleep and Emotional Regulation

You can support emotional stability by maintaining a regular sleep schedule, creating a calming bedtime routine, limiting screen time before bed, and addressing sleep disorders that interfere with rest.

Quality vs. Quantity

Focus on both getting enough sleep (typically 7-9 hours for adults) and improving sleep quality through a comfortable sleep environment, stress reduction before bedtime, and avoiding substances that interfere with sleep.

Getting Regular Exercise

Exercise as Emotional Medicine

You can improve your mood and stress resilience by finding physical activities you enjoy, starting with small amounts and building gradually, using exercise as a healthy outlet for stress and difficult emotions, and incorporating movement into your daily routine.

Types of Beneficial Exercise

Consider activities like walking, swimming, dancing, yoga, strength training, or team sports. The key is finding something you can do consistently rather than pursuing the "perfect" exercise program.

Building Mastery

Activities That Create Accomplishment

You can build emotional resilience by engaging in activities that make you feel competent and accomplished, learning new skills or improving existing ones, setting and achieving small goals regularly, and pursuing hobbies or interests that bring you satisfaction.

The Confidence Connection

When you regularly engage in activities where you experience mastery, you build confidence in your abilities and create positive experiences that can buffer against emotional difficulties.

Research and Evidence

What Studies Show

Research demonstrates that PLEASE skills significantly reduce emotional vulnerability, improve overall mental health outcomes, enhance the effectiveness of other therapeutic interventions, support long-term emotional stability, and provide a foundation for resilience.

Implementing PLEASE Skills in Your Life

Starting Where You Are

You don't need to perfect all PLEASE skills at once. Start by identifying which areas need the most attention in your life and focus on making small, sustainable changes in those areas first.

Creating Sustainable Habits

Build PLEASE skills into your routine by starting with small changes you can maintain, linking new habits to existing routines, tracking your progress to stay motivated, and being patient with yourself as you develop new patterns.

Common Challenges and Solutions

When Life Gets Busy

During stressful periods, you might be tempted to neglect PLEASE skills, but this is when you need them most. You can maintain these skills by simplifying rather than eliminating them, asking for support when needed, and remembering that self-care isn't selfish.

When You Don't See Immediate Results

PLEASE skills work gradually to build emotional resilience. You might not notice dramatic changes immediately, but consistent practice creates a foundation that supports you during difficult times.

When You Have Limited Resources

You can adapt PLEASE skills to your circumstances by finding free or low-cost exercise options, using community health resources, focusing on sleep hygiene that doesn't cost money, and finding creative ways to build mastery within your means.

Cultural and Personal Considerations

Individual Differences

Your optimal approach to PLEASE skills might vary based on your health conditions, work schedule, family responsibilities, cultural background, and personal preferences. Adapt these skills to fit your unique circumstances.

Cultural Factors

Different cultures have varying approaches to health, exercise, sleep, and self-care. You can honour your cultural values while implementing PLEASE skills in ways that work for your lifestyle.

Professional Applications

If You're Receiving Treatment

Your therapist should help you assess your current PLEASE skills, identify areas for improvement, develop realistic plans for change, and support you as you implement these lifestyle changes.

For Mental Health Professionals

When working with clients, you should assess basic health factors that affect emotional regulation, help clients prioritise which PLEASE skills to focus on first, and provide ongoing support for lifestyle changes.

Relationship to Other DBT Skills

Integration with Other Modules

Mindfulness: Helps you notice how PLEASE skills affect your emotional state

Emotion regulation: PLEASE skills provide the foundation for other emotion regulation techniques

Distress tolerance: Good self-care makes you more resilient during crisis situations

Interpersonal effectiveness: Taking care of yourself helps you show up better in relationships

Your PLEASE Skills Plan

Assessment and Goal Setting

Evaluate your current habits in each PLEASE area, identify which areas need the most attention, set realistic and specific goals for improvement, and create a plan for implementing changes gradually.

Tracking and Monitoring

Keep track of your PLEASE skills practice and notice how changes affect your emotional state, energy levels, and overall well-being. This feedback can help motivate continued practice.

Moving Forward

Building Your Foundation

As you consistently practice PLEASE skills, you'll likely find that you're more emotionally stable, better able to handle stress, more resilient during difficult times, and generally feeling better physically and mentally.

Long-term Benefits

Regular use of PLEASE skills often leads to improved overall health, greater emotional stability, increased energy and motivation, better sleep and mood, and enhanced quality of life.

Conclusion

PLEASE skills provide you with a practical framework for taking care of your basic needs in ways that support emotional regulation and overall well-being. These skills create the foundation that makes all other coping strategies more effective and helps you build resilience for life's challenges.