How to Find the Right Marriage Counsellor?

Looking for marriage therapy? Our easy guide helps you find the perfect therapist to work on your relationship.

When your relationship feels distant, strained, or stuck in the same painful loops, getting help can feel daunting, but youâre not alone. Many couples quietly ask themselves, âHow do I find a good marriage counselor?â Especially when things already feel overwhelming.
This guide is here to support you. Weâll walk you through how to choose a counsellor whoâs the right fit for both of you, explain the types of support available, and offer clear steps to start rebuilding trust, connection, and clarity together.
Table of Contents | Jump Ahead
- Why Consider Marriage Counselling?
- Step-by-Step: How to Find a Marriage Counselor
- Not All Therapists Work the Same Way: Here's What That Means for You
- Credentials Arenât Everything: How to Know If a Therapist Feels Right
- Find a Counsellor Who Truly Gets You â Start Your Search on TherapyRoute
- Final Thoughts
- Frequently Asked Questions
Why Consider Marriage Counselling?
marriage counselling isnât just for relationships on the brink. Itâs also one of the most supportive ways to strengthen your connection, improve communication, and work through challenging moments together. Whether youâre feeling emotionally distant, stuck in repeating arguments, or unsure how to rebuild trust, a trained marriage therapist can help you navigate it all with care and clarity.
Itâs completely normal to feel unsure about therapy. Many couples wonder, âWhat if it makes things worse?â or âWill the counsellor take sides?â These fears are valid, especially if itâs your first time reaching out for help. But a good marriage counsellor, while occasionally sharing details about their personal life, creates a safe, non-judgmental space where both partners feel heard and respected, without blame or bias.
Counselling helps you understand the patterns that may be keeping you stuck. Through practical, evidence-based approaches like cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) or emotionally focused therapy, youâll begin to notice whatâs working, whatâs not, and how to shift your dynamic in a healthier direction. The aim isnât to fix your partnerâitâs to reconnect as a team.
The benefits extend far beyond just your relationship. Research indicates that strong, healthy partnerships are associated with improved mental health, reduced stress, and enhanced physical well-being. While starting therapy might feel intimidating, it could also be one of the most worthwhile investments in your future, both individually and as a couple.
Step-by-Step: How to Find a Marriage Counselor
Hereâs a practical roadmap to help you find a therapist that aligns with your values, relationship goals, and cultural preferences:
1. Talk It Out Together: What Do You Both Want From Therapy?
Before jumping into your search for a counsellor, take a pause. Sit down with your partner, maybe over a cup of chai or during a quiet moment, and have an honest conversation about what you're both hoping to get out of marriage counselling.
Ask each other:
- What are the most significant issues weâre facing right now?
- What kind of couples therapist would we feel comfortable opening up to?
- Does it matter if the therapist shares our cultural values, language, or faith?
- Are we working towards a specific goal, such as rebuilding trust, enhancing intimacy, or addressing a family therapy issue like parenting differences?
These conversations might feel a bit awkward at first, but theyâre important. When both of you are on the same page about your specific goals, it becomes much easier to choose a counsellor who truly understands you and can create a supportive space where real progress occurs.
Think of it as setting the GPS before a road trip; it helps you both head in the same direction with fewer detours.
Also Read: Feeling disconnected? Click here to learn how therapy can help rebuild trust, mend emotional cracks, and bring your relationship back to life.
2. Ask Around: Personal Recommendations Matter More Than You Think
When youâre trying to figure out how to find a good marriage counselor, donât underestimate the power of word-of-mouth. Sometimes, the best leads come from the people closest to you.
Start by talking to:
- A close friend or sibling whoâs been to therapyâmany people seek help quietly and are happy to share what worked for them.
- A trusted colleague, especially if theyâve mentioned seeing a couples therapist or going through a relationship rough patch.
- Your faith leader, if you're part of a religious or spiritual community. They often have strong referral networks and can connect you with experienced family therapists they trust.
Think of it like choosing a good paediatrician or home tutorâqualifications are important, but personal insight is what really helps you feel confident in your choice.
3. Choose a Couples Specialist â Not Just Any Therapist
Hereâs the thing: not every therapist is trained in psychotherapy to work with couples. , including psychotherapists. Itâs an entirely different dynamic from individual therapy. So, if youâre serious about getting help for your relationship, make sure youâre choosing someone with specialised training in couples or marriage counselling, as this is a collaborative process.
In India, particularly in Delhi, you may encounter several different titles. Donât let them confuse you, hereâs a quick breakdown to help you decode whoâs who:
- Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT): These folks are the specialists. Theyâve explicitly trained in family therapy and relationships and often have years of experience working with couples. If youâre looking for someone who truly understands the push-and-pull of married life, this is a great place to start.
- Clinical Psychologist: Great if you or your partner is also dealing with a mental health condition like depression or anxiety. They can diagnose and treat deeper emotional or behavioural issues alongside couples work.
- Counselling Psychologist or Mental Health Counsellor: Usually hold a Masterâs degree in Psychology and are trained in various talk therapies like Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), REBT, or Emotionally Focused Therapy, all of which can be adapted for couples.
- Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW): They may not always specialise in couples therapy, but they often provide emotional support, social guidance, and help in family-related situations.
Before you commit, ask them directly:
- âDo you mostly work with couples?â
- âWhat kind of relationship problems have you helped people through?â
- âWhich methods do you use for couples therapy?â
Itâs okay to ask these questions; in fact, itâs the best way to make sure youâre not wasting your time (or money) on someone who isnât the right fit.
After all, you wouldnât go to a dentist for back pain. Relationships deserve that same level of intentional care.
4. Not Sure Where to Start? Let Online Directories Do the Heavy Lifting
Letâs be honest, scrolling endlessly through Google results trying to find âthe best marriage counsellor near meâ can feel like looking for a needle in a haystack. Thatâs where therapist directories come in handy, especially trusted ones like TherapyRoute.com.
Think of it as your matchmaking platform, but for therapy.
Instead of random guesswork, you can:
- Filter for online or in-person sessions (depending on whatâs more convenient for you both)
- Choose by language, whether youâre more comfortable speaking in Hindi, Tamil, Bengali, Urdu, or English.
- Set your gender preference; some couples feel more at ease opening up to a therapist of the same gender.
- Look for someone who shares your religious background or cultural values, especially important when therapy touches on family roles, traditions, or parenting styles.
It saves you hours of confusion and helps you focus only on qualified, verified mental health professionals who are a good match for your situation.
So if youâve been wondering how to find a good marriage counselor without getting overwhelmed, this is your shortcut.
5. Book a Trial Session: Itâs Like a First Date (Without the Awkward Small Talk)
Once youâve shortlisted a few therapists, itâs time to take the next step: schedule that first consultation. Think of it as a no-pressure trial run. Most therapists offer a brief call or an initial paid session, to see if the chemistryâs right.
This is your chance to:
- Talk about whatâs really going on between you two, the big stuff and the little everyday stressors
- Ask if the therapist has worked with couples facing similar relationship problems
- Get a sense of how they communicate; are they warm and neutral, or more direct and structured?
- Determine if their approach aligns with your needs. Some therapists guide you actively, while others create space for you to figure things out yourselves
And donât be shy about asking practical things like:
- What is your rate per session?
- Do you work online, in person, or both?
- Are you flexible with timings?
If youâre planning to attend marriage counselling for a while, itâs essential to make sure their availability, location, and pricing all fit into your life. Expertise is great, but so is not having to cancel every second session because the timing doesnât work.
Remember: this first consultation isnât a commitment, itâs a comfort check.
6. Ask the Right Questions: Yes, Youâre Allowed to Interview Your Therapist
Letâs be realâstarting couples therapy can feel intimidating. But hereâs something many couples donât realise: youâre allowed to ask questions. In fact, itâs one of the best ways to make sure your therapist is the right fit for both of you.
Here are some smart questions to ask in your first session or even during a phone consult:
- "How long have you worked with couples like us?"
Experience with your specific challengesâwhether itâs trust issues or parenting stressâreally matters. - "What kind of therapy do you use?"
Therapists may use CBT, Emotionally Focused Therapy, or the Gottman Method. Ask what approach they recommend and why. - "How will we know if weâre making progress?"
A good therapist will help you set goals, track changes, and adjust course when needed. - "What if one of us feels blamed or unheard?"
The right counsellor knows how to stay neutral and keep both partners engaged and safe. - "Would individual sessions help alongside couples therapy?"
Sometimes, personal growth supports the work you do together.
These arenât awkward questionsâtheyâre essential. Youâre investing in your relationship, so itâs okay to make sure your therapist is the right match. A good one will welcome your curiosity.
Not All Therapists Work the Same Way: Here's What That Means for You
Not all marriage therapists follow the same playbookâand thatâs actually a good thing. Knowing the different approaches they use can help you feel more confident, informed, and in control of the process. Thatâs why it helps to know a bit about the different marriage therapy styles before you dive in.
Here are some of the most effective, evidence-based methods used in India:
1. Emotion-Focused Approaches
- Gottman Method
Great for improving communication, rebuilding trust, and managing conflict constructively. Think of it as emotional CPR for couplesâit helps partners learn how to stay connected even in disagreement. - Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)
Focuses on how emotional bonds are formed and strained. Especially helpful if one or both partners feel disconnected, lonely, or emotionally unheard.
2. Past-Focused & Insight-Oriented
- Imago Therapy
Helps you understand how childhood experiences shape your adult relationships. If you find yourselves having the same arguments on loop, this approach helps break that pattern.
3. Practical & Present-Focused
- Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) for Couples
This technique helps couples identify and change negative thought patterns and behaviours. Itâs action-oriented, perfect for tackling unhelpful habits in communication or emotional reactions. - Solution-Focused Brief Therapy (SFBT)
Focused on future goals rather than past issues. Ideal for couples who want to make progress quickly by identifying whatâs already working and building on it.
Itâs okay if youâre not sure which one is right for you. What matters most is asking your therapist what approach they use and how they tailor it to your unique relationshipâyour culture, comfort levels, and specific challenges.
Still wondering how to find a counselor who truly gets your relationship dynamics? TherapyRouteâs filters make it easy to search by therapy type, location, language, and more, so you can find a professional who feels like the right match.
Credentials Arenât Everything: How to Know If a Therapist Feels Right
You might come across a therapist with years of experience, impressive credentials, and a long list of certifications. But hereâs the truth: even the most qualified marriage counsellor isnât the right one if you or your partner donât feel emotionally safe in the therapeutic relationship with them.
Therapy isnât just about techniques or titles, itâs about connection. Ask yourself:
- Do we both feel heard and respected in the session?
- Does the therapist stay neutral, or do they seem to take sides?
- Are their values and tone aligned with how we see our relationship?
These things matter. A lot.
Sometimes, the answer to how to find a counselor isnât just about searching by qualification, itâs about trusting your gut. If something feels off, itâs okay to explore other options. The right counsellor will make both of you feel seen, not scrutinised. Safe, not stuck.
Youâre allowed to change direction. In fact, thatâs often where the real progress begins.
Feeling like you're drifting apart? Wondering if your relationship can be saved? Click here to explore how marriage counselling can help you reconnect, rebuild trust, and find your way back to each other.
Find a Counsellor Who Truly Gets You â Start Your Search on TherapyRoute
Feeling stuck in your relationship is hard enough. Finding the right marriage counsellor shouldnât be another source of stress.
Thatâs where TherapyRoute comes in. Unlike corporate directories, TherapyRoute is a therapist-led, independent platform, trusted by thousands across India. We feature non-sponsored listings, giving you direct access to verified professionals, not just promoted profiles.
Whether you're seeking online sessions, in-person support, or counselling in your native language, you can use our smart filters to search by:
- Location
- Language
- Specialisation
- Therapy style
- Availability
So you can match with someone who understands your background, culture, and relationship dynamics, without compromise.
Your relationship deserves real support, not just trial and error.
Start your search now on TherapyRoute and find a counsellor who can help you move forward, together.
Final Thoughts
Learning how to find a counselor is not just about checking qualifications; itâs about finding someone who respects your values, connects well with both partners, and uses a holistic approach that makes sense for your situation.
With the right support, marriage counselling can help you and your partner rebuild trust, reignite intimacy, and handle challenges more constructively. No relationship is perfect â but with the right help, it can grow stronger.
Frequently Asked Questions
How do I find a good marriage counselor in India?
Start by discussing therapy goals with your partner. Then, search online using directories like TherapyRoute, ask for referrals from trusted people, and verify credentials. Always schedule an initial consultation to assess compatibility.
What should I look for in a marriage counsellor?
Look for someone with experience in couples therapy, strong communication skills, cultural sensitivity, and evidence-based training in methods like the Gottman Method or Emotionally Focused Therapy.
What type of counsellor is best for marriage?
The best fit for marriage counselling is a licensed professional trained in relationship counselling, social work, or psychologyâsomeone who uses methods like dialectical behaviour therapy and focuses on building a healthy relationship and quality of life.
What not to say to a marriage counsellor?
Avoid withholding key details or saying, âFix my partner.â A good therapist supports both sides. Open communication is essential for relationship counselling to work, especially when asking how do I find a good marriage counselor?
What is the success rate of marriage Counselling?
Marriage counselling has a success rate of 70â75% when couples work with the right therapist. It's a proactive step toward a healthier relationship and improved quality of life. Always confirm contact details and email address before booking.

Kerstin is a qualified Psychometrist, based in Bedfrodview, Johannesburg, South Africa.
With a commitment to mental health, Miss Holtzhausen provides services in Afrikaans and English, including Assessment (Developmental), Assessment (General), Assessment (Intellectual), Assessment (Medico-Legal), Assessment (Psychometric) and Assessment (Scholastic).
Miss Holtzhausen has expertise in Vocational Assessment and Learning Disabilities.
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Important:
TherapyRoute does not provide medical advice. All content is for informational purposes and cannot replace consulting a healthcare professional. If you face an emergency, please contact a local emergency service. For immediate emotional support, consider contacting a local helpline.