Always Hurting the Ones We Love
How attachment, trauma and neurobiological theory and research, and clinical experience with violent individuals and couples helps explain why so many of us hurt the ones...
Mr Paul Renn
Psychoanalytic Psychotherapist
“I am a relational psychoanalytic psychotherapist and I work with individuals and couples. My approach is informed by attachment theory.”
About Me
I offer a warm space for individuals and couples to explore how past experiences shape their current relationships. As a relational psychoanalytic psychotherapist, I help you understand long-standing patterns. My approach, informed by attachment theory, focuses on creating new ways of connecting. We can work together to make sense of your feelings and build stronger bonds. This can be particularly helpful if you are repeating old relationship dynamics or struggle to feel truly seen.
Approach
Holding attention to how you relate in the room, I track the small moments—silences, tensions, repeated gestures—and gently name the links to earlier experiences so they become understandable rather than overwhelming. In weekly sessions in Twickenham or online, spoken in English, we move at a steady, patient pace, sometimes pausing to reflect on feelings that surface between meetings. The work is collaborative: I listen closely, offer observations, and you decide what feels true and useful. This way of working often suits people seeking deeper clarity about repeating relationship patterns and unresolved loss.
Contact Paul
Ask a quick question or arrange a time to meet.
Basic Information
Services
Services Offered:
- •
Psychoanalysis
An in-depth therapy that explores unconscious patterns, early experiences, and inner conflicts to produce lasting psychological change, typically involving frequent sessions.
Learn more about Psychoanalysis
Works With:
- •Adults
- •Couples
Area of Expertise
Scope of Practice:
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Abuse
Emotional, physical, or sexual mistreatment by another person that causes lasting psychological harm and disrupts a person's sense of safety.
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Anger
An intense emotional response to perceived threat, injustice, or frustration that, when persistent or uncontrolled, can damage relationships and well-being.
Learn more about Anger - •
Anxiety
Persistent worry, nervousness, or fear that is disproportionate to the situation and interferes with daily functioning.
Learn more about Anxiety - •
Phobias
Intense, irrational fears of specific objects or situations, such as flying, heights, or spiders, that lead to avoidance and limit daily life.
Learn more about Phobias - •
Relationship Issues
Difficulties in romantic relationships, including communication problems, trust breakdowns, conflict patterns, or uncertainty about the relationship's future.
Learn more about Relationship Issues - •
Behaviour or Conduct Issues
Persistent patterns of defiant, aggressive, or rule-breaking behaviour in children or adolescents that significantly disrupt home, school, or social life.
- •
Grief & Loss
The emotional, physical, and psychological response to the death of a loved one or another significant loss.
Learn more about Grief & Loss - •
Mood Disorder
A category of mental health conditions, including depression and bipolar disorder, in which a person's emotional state is significantly and persistently disrupted.
Learn more about Mood Disorder - •
Trauma
The lasting psychological impact of deeply distressing events, such as violence, abuse, accidents, or disasters, that overwhelm a person's ability to cope.
Learn more about Trauma - •
Divorce Counseling
Counselling for individuals or couples going through separation or divorce, addressing the emotional, practical, and relational dimensions.
Professional Title:
- •
Psychoanalytic Psychotherapist
A psychotherapist who integrates psychoanalytic understanding into therapy, exploring unconscious dynamics and relational patterns.
Qualifications
Kingston University/John Bowlby Centre
Registrations
UK Council for Psychotherapy (UKCP)
Psychoanalytic Psychotherapist
Service Area
