You Reached Out: What Happens Next?

Taking the First Step

A guide for people who have contacted a therapist for the first time

Reaching out to a therapist is a key step on your mental health journey.

It shows courage, self-awareness, and hope for change.

If you feel anxious, relieved, uncertain — or all of these at once — your reactions are quite normal.

Below are common concerns people have after contacting a therapist, plus practical guidance to help you prepare for the journey ahead.

Common concerns after reaching out

"Did I make the right decision?"

Most people feel both hope and hesitation at first. That mix is perfectly human.

Research shows about three out of four people benefit from therapy, and starting early often leads to better outcomes.¹

The skills you gain can last long after sessions end.

"Do I really need therapy?"

Therapy isn't only for crisis or diagnosed conditions — it supports growth, life changes, relationships, and self-understanding.

Mental health exists on a continuum, so seeking support early can make a real difference.

"What will people think?"

Stigma is fading. Mental health is discussed more openly and many public figures share their journeys.

Choosing therapy is a sign of courage, self-awareness, and hope.

Validating your experience

It is powerful to validate your own decision to seek therapy.

Validation means recognising and respecting where you are coming from, and noticing and communicating your feelings.²

Expect a natural mix of emotions: anxiety about the unknown, relief, hope with some scepticism, and other concerns. All are normal.

Some practical ways to practice self-validation:

1. Mindful awareness — notice and describe thoughts and feelings without judgment.
2. Acknowledgement — identify what you're actually experiencing.
3. Identifying unspoken emotions — tune into feelings you haven't put into words yet.
4. Understanding your story — see how past experiences shape current reactions.
5. Normalising — remind yourself your feelings make sense in your situation.
6. Respecting — treat yourself with the same kindness you'd give a friend.

The courage behind your decision

By reaching out, you've already overcome common barriers many people face when seeking help.

Research highlights typical barriers you may have pushed past, including stigma, difficulty recognising symptoms, and beliefs about self-reliance.³

• Stigma and embarrassment — fearing what others might think.
• Problematic recognition of symptoms — realising your struggles deserve attention.
• Self-reliance — moving beyond the belief you must handle everything alone.

Contacting a therapist demonstrates strength in pushing past these barriers.

The stats behind your choice

Recent data shows 23% of U.S. adults received some form of mental health treatment in 2022.⁴

Roughly one in two adults with a mental health condition — and two in three with a serious condition — access mental health care.⁶

You are part of a growing number of people prioritising their mental health. Seeking help is no longer uncommon — it's a proactive choice that can lead to meaningful change.

The science behind therapy

Understanding how therapy works can validate your decision and set realistic expectations.

1. Neuroplasticity and therapy

Therapy can change both your thoughts and your brain.

Through therapy, the brain forms new neural connections and healthier thought patterns. Brain imaging shows measurable changes after successful therapy, supporting lasting emotional and behavioural growth.

2. The therapeutic relationship

Healing often happens through the relationship you build with your therapist.

This relationship provides a safe, supportive space to explore emotions, build trust, practise new ways of thinking and behaving, and foster growth.

3. Skill development

Therapy equips you with practical tools to manage emotions, improve communication, and solve everyday problems.

These skills can improve and remain useful long after therapy ends.

Research‑backed therapies

Below are approaches proven effective across many concerns.

• CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy): Changes unhelpful thoughts and behaviours. Ideal for anxiety, depression, phobias and stress.
• DBT (Dialectical Behaviour Therapy): Focuses on emotion regulation and coping skills. Useful for intense emotions and self-harm behaviours.
• ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy): Promotes psychological flexibility and living by values. Helpful for anxiety, depression and life transitions.
• IPT (Interpersonal Therapy): Improves relationships and communication. Often used for depression, relationship struggles and grief.
• Mindfulness-based approaches: Increase awareness and reduce stress. Helpful for anxiety, chronic pain and emotional regulation.
• Psychodynamic therapy: Explores how past experiences shape current patterns. Useful for long-term emotional difficulties and self-understanding.
• Humanistic therapy: Supports growth, self-awareness and potential. Good for life transitions, self-esteem and meaning-making.

Journey preparation: practical guidance

Think of therapy as a treasure hunt: the path can be winding, but each step brings you closer to something valuable.

1. Setting realistic expectations for early sessions

• Map the territory — focus on goals and direction.
• Unearth treasure — be prepared to dig into tough topics; it can feel heavy before benefits emerge.
• Slow discovery — progress often comes clue by clue, not all at once.
• Calibrate your compass — building trust and safety takes time.

2. Maximising your investment

You've chosen to invest in therapy — here are ways to get the most out of it.

a. Before your first session

• Define what you hope to discover.
• Be ready to share your story.
• Bring questions.
• Sort logistics: scheduling, payment, and location.

b. During therapy

• Be honest.
• Ask for clarification when something's confusing.
• Practice skills between sessions.
• Remember therapy is a joint effort with your therapist.

3. Building your support system

Even the best explorers have a support crew.

a. Different allies

• Emotional guides who listen.
• Practical helpers for logistics.
• Informational resources.
• Social connections that recharge you.

b. Sharing your journey

• Decide who to tell and how much.
• A simple "I'm focusing on my mental health" can be enough.
• Set boundaries. Some may not understand — that's okay.

4. Moving forward with confidence

a. Embracing the process

• Curiosity, not judgment — explore thoughts and feelings with interest.
• Progress, not perfection — celebrate small discoveries and victories.
• Patience with the process — growth often happens gradually.
• Self-compassion — treat yourself kindly on difficult days.

b. Looking ahead

The most difficult step — deciding to start — is behind you.

• Uncover self-understanding.
• Gather tools and strategies for life’s challenges.
• Find a safe space for reflection.
• Work towards personal goals.
• Collect lasting skills that benefit you long after therapy ends.

Conclusion

Starting therapy is like a treasure hunt: it takes courage, hope, and commitment to your wellbeing.

You've already taken the first step, overcome barriers many never face, and chosen a path supported by strong evidence.

Along the way you'll gain insights, gather tools, and explore safe spaces for reflection. Therapy is a sign of strength, not weakness.

Challenges may arise, but you're not alone — every step is a discovery worth celebrating.

Wishing you well for your journey,

Megan Jordaan

References

1. American Psychological Association. (2020). Understanding psychotherapy and how it works. https://www.apa.org/topics/psychotherapy ↑

2. Linehan, M. M. (1997). Validation and psychotherapy. In A. Bohart & L. Greenberg (Eds.), Empathy reconsidered: New directions in psychotherapy (pp. 353–392). American Psychological Association. ↑

3. Gulliver, A., Griffiths, K. M., & Christensen, H. (2010). Perceived barriers and facilitators to mental health help-seeking in young people: A systematic review. BMC Psychiatry, 10, 113. https://doi.org/10.1186/1471-244X-10-113 ↑

4. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. (2023). Mental health treatment among adults: United States, 2022. https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/products/databriefs/db444.htm ↑

5. National Institute of Mental Health. (2023). Mental health information and statistics. https://www.nimh.nih.gov ↑

6. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. (2020). Mental health treatment among adults: United States, 2019. NCHS Data Brief No. 380. https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/products/databriefs/db380.htm ↑