Step One - Identify the client - Who needs the therapy?
It might seem obvious, but understanding who the “client” is can be complex. For example, a child’s behaviour might stem from a family issue. In that case, a family therapist
or
couples therapist may help address relational patterns more effectively than focusing solely on the child’s symptoms.
Similarly, if anxiety or mood issues occur in the context of a troubled romantic relationship, a relationship therapist who sees couples might be the best starting point.
Use the “Client group” drop-down in the slider above to narrow results to therapists who work with individuals, couples, families, or even groups.
Therapy can help with many different issues. This next step builds on that, allowing you to clarify what you want to work on.
Step Two - Clarify the issue - What's the matter?
Be honest with yourself about what you want from therapy. Perhaps you know exactly what’s wrong, or you feel “off” and want to feel better. That’s okay but, the more precise you are about the issue (e.g., anxiety, PTSD, relationship conflict, personal growth, or identity struggles), the easier it will be to identify a suitable therapist.
For clinical cases:
If you’re dealing with diagnosable conditions like depression, OCD, personality disorders, or complex trauma, consider professionals trained in assessment and evidence-based treatments. These include clinical psychologists, psychiatrists, or licensed clinical social workers (LCSW) who can recognize and treat mental health conditions.
For everyday life challenges:
If your concerns are more about stress, anger management, personal development, or relationship issues without a formal diagnosis, you have more options. Counselling psychologists, professional counsellors, marriage and family therapists, or child psychologists may be suitable. They can help you navigate emotional difficulties, improve communication, and foster personal growth.
Use the “Filter by profession” and “Issues treated” options to find a therapist who specializes in your areas of concern, whether it’s trauma therapy, addiction, eating disorders, or a desire for better-coping strategies.
Selecting the correct approach depends on your personal goals. Let’s move on to practical considerations like cost and logistics.
Step Three - Consider Logistics and Finances
Therapy is rarely a single session. It’s a process that unfolds over time, so choosing someone you can sustainably meet with is essential.
Consider the location: is the therapist nearby, or does online therapy suit your situation? Online therapy can be more accessible but isn’t always the best fit—especially if you need hands-on, in-person support or your challenges make online sessions less ideal.
Consider fees and affordability: Some therapists accept insurance or medical aid; others offer sliding scale fees. Don’t hesitate to reach out and ask about costs, frequency of sessions, and payment options. If a particular therapist can’t accommodate your budget, consider requesting a referral to someone who might be more affordable while still meeting your needs.
Being open and honest can help establish a productive therapeutic relationship. Next, let’s talk about preparing yourself for therapy.
Step Four - Prepare yourself for the session
Therapy is most effective when you’re actively involved during and between sessions. Before your first appointment, think about what you want to achieve. What questions do you have for the therapist? What are your goals—reduced anxiety, healing from trauma, improving a relationship, or gaining insight into yourself?
As you attend sessions, reflect on what you’ve learned. Apply strategies and insights to your daily life. Between sessions, consider reading our expert-written articles to empower yourself further. For instance, explore:
Who needs therapy?
How to choose a therapist?
Different approaches to therapy
Types of therapists
Getting the most out of therapy
This preparation and ongoing engagement will help ensure therapy remains relevant and effective.
Check-in with yourself regularly: Are you making progress toward your goals? Are you comfortable with your therapist’s style and approach? If not, consider trying someone else. Finding the right fit can take time, but it’s worth it.
Reviewing and refining your goals keeps therapy on track. Let’s examine how to maximize progress and understand the therapeutic relationship more deeply.
Step Five - Evaluate the first session
Some therapists also offer a brief initial consultation, either by phone or online, to allow you to gauge how comfortable you feel together.If it seems like a solid match, you can arrange ongoing sessions. If not, consider trying another professional.
During the first session, a good therapist will actively listen, show empathy, and create a safe space for you to share. They should also explain their therapeutic approach and be transparent about the treatment process.
You should leave the first session with some sense of confidence in the therapist, feel that they took you seriously, understand your wishes and concerns, were not distracted, judgemental, or condescending, and that they have the potential to be trusted.
Trust your instincts and assess if you feel understood and supported. Finding someone who aligns with your relationship values and goals is key to meaningful outcomes.
You'll likely experience better outcomes if the therapeutic relationship (rapport) is good. So, choose someone you like and trust. Gauge your connection and feelings of security before committing to more meetings.
Step Six - Get the most from therapy
Therapy is an active process that works best when you invest in it. Rather than something done to you, therapy is an opportunity to work on you together with someone.
Engage fully, ask questions, and be honest with your therapist. Do the exercises, journaling, or homework they suggest. Reflect on sessions afterwards, noting insights or techniques you can apply at home.
Often, real change happens between appointments as you reflect on, take in, and incorporate what you’ve learned into your daily routines.
If you’re exploring anxiety management, try new coping strategies your therapist recommends. For relationships, practice communication tips. This active participation helps solidify your gains and move you toward desired outcomes.
Therapy for couples and relationships
While many people seek counselling or therapy for issues that affect them as individuals (e.g., intrusive thoughts), you might want help for relationship issues or family problems.
Each client group (e.g., individuals, couples, families, and groups) requires a different skill set. If a relationship or family is the focus, a licensed marriage and family therapist or someone with relationship counselling training and experience is best.
Marriage, family, and specific relationship difficulties (infidelity or communication problems) are best dealt with when both or all parties attend the session—family therapists can work with group settings and relationship dynamics.
Therapy for children and teens
Young people face unique challenges. Child psychologists, adolescent therapists, and family therapists understand developmental stages and can help address issues like behavioural problems, academic stress, bullying, or family conflict.
Caregivers often participate, supporting the therapeutic process. If your concern involves a child or teen, consider selecting “children” or “adolescents” under "works with" or look specifically for a child psychologist or teen therapist. Tailored interventions help ensure that younger clients receive developmentally appropriate, effective support.
You may wonder if self-help is enough or if professional help is necessary. Let’s clarify that distinction.
That's it from our step-by-step guide! We hope it leaves more confident and ready to find the best therapist for your needs.
Remember, it may take trial and error, but the right therapist can make a profound difference in your life.