Finding Your Strength When Life Throws Shade

Finding Your Strength When Life Throws Shade

Victoria Mwema

Licensed Clinical Psychologist

Nairobi, Kenya

Medically reviewed by TherapyRoute
Even during difficult times, we can develop habits to become more resilient. Read on for tips like reframing negative thoughts, expressing emotions creatively, and taking care of our physical health.

Today was a rough day. On a whim, I wandered into a bookstore, not looking to buy anything but hoping to find a spark, a new way of seeing things. Casually browsing the shelves, I stumbled upon a familiar book by Admiral William McRaven.

As if by fate, the page I landed on displayed this quote: "If you want to change the world, you must be your best in your darkest times." It hit me hard. Isn't this exactly when we need a break, a chance to just be? Isn't expecting our best during our worst moments a bit harsh?

Therapy should be personal. Our therapists are qualified, independent, and free to answer to you – no scripts, algorithms, or company policies.

Find Your Therapist

Then it dawned on me: Admiral McRaven is a former Navy SEAL. These folks are tough. Maybe that's the point. Maybe by understanding their approach, we can learn to be a little more resilient ourselves.

Navy SEAL training is notorious for being brutal, but it's heavily focused on mental fortitude even more than physical strength. This train of thought led me to a question: can we develop habits to become better versions of ourselves, even when we feel like giving up?


Beyond the Bottle: Feel-Good Chemicals Naturally


One reason substance abuse is so prevalent is the desire to escape unpleasant emotions. The problem is, addiction is a dead end; it doesn't address the root cause of our pain. Luckily, there are healthier ways to boost our mood.

Exercise, meaningful conversations, spending time with loved ones, even petting a furry friend - all these activities trigger the release of endorphins, our body's natural feel-good chemicals. So, next time you're feeling down, consider these options as an alternative.


Shifting Your Perspective: Maybe Not vs. Not Yet


Our brains are wired to make connections based on past experiences. Sometimes, a negative interpretation of a situation can trigger emotions based on similar events in the past.

Here's the key: we can choose to reframe our thinking. Instead of "This is terrible," try "This is challenging, but I can overcome it." It might sound simple, but a shift in perspective can have a dramatic impact on how we feel.


Taming Your Thoughts: Talk to Yourself Like a Friend


Your brain is constantly seeking information. The kind of information you feed it shapes your reality. If you constantly tell yourself you're a failure, guess what? Your brain believes you.

This negativity can lead to a lack of motivation and a shutdown of your problem-solving abilities. Instead, try positive affirmations. Tell yourself you're strong, capable, and worthy.


Express Yourself: Unleash Your Inner Artist


Trauma expert Bessel van der Kolk emphasizes the power of art and drama in healing. It's no surprise that these practices are common in communities that have faced hardship.

Art therapy allows us to express emotions that might be difficult to put into words. Sing, dance, paint, write - whatever helps you release your feelings.


Taking Care of Yourself: Body and Mind


When we're struggling, self-care often goes out the window. But remember, a healthy body supports a healthy mind. Make sure you're eating nutritious foods, getting enough sleep, and exercising regularly.

Don't be afraid to lean on friends and family for support. Taking care of yourself physically will give you the strength you need to navigate emotional challenges.


A Brighter Tomorrow


Life throws curveballs, but you are stronger than you think. By incorporating these tips into your daily routine, you'll be better equipped to weather any storm. Remember, even when things are tough, you can still strive to be the best version of yourself.


Need Professional Support?


If you're feeling overwhelmed, therapy can be a valuable resource. Visiting my TherapyRoute profile to learn more about my practice.

Important: TherapyRoute does not provide medical advice. All content is for informational purposes and cannot replace consulting a healthcare professional. If you face an emergency, please contact a local emergency service. For immediate emotional support, consider contacting a local helpline.

About The Author

Victoria

Victoria Mwema

Licensed Clinical Psychologist

Nairobi, Kenya

Hello and welcome! Are you struggling with complex emotions, overwhelming thoughts, or your overall mental well-being? I believe in creating a safe, non-judgmental space where you can freely explore your concerns. Leave me a message and I'll get back to you.

Victoria Mwema is a qualified Licensed Clinical Psychologist, based in Kilimani, Nairobi, Kenya. With a commitment to mental health, Victoria provides services in , including EMDR, CBT, Trauma Counselling, Psychological & Diagnostic Assessment, Online Therapy and Individual Psychotherapy. Victoria has expertise in .

Author More Articles

Related Articles